“I’m in competition with myself, and well, I’m losing”
Many people claim not to be “competitive.” I think I disagree. We don’t need to be an athlete, preparing for the big game to be competitive. Aside from competing with others in games or the workplace, I would stretch the idea of competition into your own personal experience and with that of the natural world. We are all competing to survive. If the ground started to shake and break beneath your feet and fire starting raining from the heavens, we would be competing with nature to survive. But also, in our own hearts, we are always competing—to be better people, to reach our goals, to deal best with let down and anger and frustration and hate. It’s a magnetic pull we all have: One of the magnets is our own heart, the other, is the name you insert for the Divine. To get there, we must face 10,000 trials, each of which we must arrive with strength, endurance, and a willingness to accept to defeat, knowing it’s not the end.
This arena of human experience relates to Mars and Saturn. And by the end of the Summer, they will have forged an alliance in the raging fires of our Desires, with Antares as the judge…
(Aug. 24th. 9 Sagittarius. Both conjunct Antares, the “Heart of the Scorpion/Scorpio.” Transformation near complete!)
As I write, the Moon is perfectly opposed Mars in the sky. The feeling she reels in can be like Roger’s quote above. A sensation of being far away from the goal. But we must be easy on ourselves. We are in training for the Championship game. Just before sunrise tomorrow, she will pull in a similar emotion, by opposing Saturn. The most important essence to distill from these subtle alignments, is the inspiration to DO IT and DO your best while trying. Lots of fear clouds the air around Mars and Saturn, and if you are in the know about what is to come at the end of August, stop yourself, reflect deeply on what is actually going on with the two of them, and realize that they are actually gifting us the power to change. It’s an alchemical set, and if we are willing, we could witness the most profound shift in our lives if we are ready to transmute the fear into love. We must clock the hours in our practices though, being relentless in our effort to be the best we can possibly be.
Last time Mars and Saturn came together, it was essentially the same day in August, back in 2014. It was precisely the day of the horrific earthquake in Peru, the week we witnessed the execution by ISIS of the American journalist, the midst of the Ebola scare, and we were still mourning the suicide of Robin Williams (I’m sure he too, felt like he was losing…). It was in Scorpio. Macabre topics do transpire with these two “malefics,” yet, I remember for myself, despite all the toxic detritus I was wading through in the muddy waters, I was also able to address it, improvise, and utilize all the dark content of my Psyche, using it as fertilizer for my heart, thus turning the “blue meanies” into beautiful lotuses.
If you are going to take anything from reading this, know that Fear only makes it worse. Whatever it is you are dealing with, make a goal, stick with it, and watch yourself improve day in and day out. Find a practice that works on all levels. Connect to a force way bigger than you, and ask for its assistance. You are not alone. You never were. And you never will be.
…now, back to the practice at hand.